Recipe of the day: Beet Hummus

Hummus is a great dip that’s quite popular in this piece of shit part of the world. What’s not to like? It goes great with virtually any meant, it even makes vegetables interesting! Not only that, it’s actually quite healthy for you as it’s loaded with healthy fats and antioxidants. But what if I told you that you could make it healthier and prettier at the same time? What sorcery do I speak of, you ask?

Why, beets!

You all now beets, otherwise known locally as “بنجر” that wonderful root vegetable that is notoriously hard to deal with without transforming your naked hands into what they would look like if they hate fist fucked a bear on its period.

So how exactly can we make hummus more interesting for the pallet and the eyes? We get experimental.

Ingredients:

• ½ a pound of steamed/boiled beets
• 2 tablespoons boiled chickpeas
• 4 tablespoons tahini paste
• ½ a glass of water
• juice from a full lemon
• 1 tablespoon olive oil
• ½ teaspoon chili powder
• ½ teaspoon cumin powder
• salt to taste

Process:

1. The biggest hassle in this process is dicing and dealing with the beets, so I advise you buy some of those latex surgery gloves from any pharmacy or major chain supermarket so you don’t end up looking like a cheaper remake of Dexter.
2. You can either skin the beets before chopping them into cubes or cook them with the skin on and removing it afterwards before chopping them into cubes. The trick if you’re choosing the latter option is to scrub the shit out of them to remove the mud from the skin.
3. Steam or Boil the chopped beets for 20-25 minutes until they are soft but still retaining their firmness.
4. Boil the chickpeas for 20-30 minutes till tender.
5. In a blender or food processor, add the cooked beet cubes, the cooked chickpeas, tahini paste, water, lemon juice, olive oil and condiments.
6. Blend until smooth, stopping to stir occasionally the parts that get pushed away from the blades back into the center.
7. Keep blending until all ingredients have mixed well and the desired consistency has been achieved.
8. Try and stop yourself from licking the blender clean before so much as a teaspoon of this stuff touches a plate.

There you have it! My recipe of the day! Hope you like it...

You can have it with virtually anything on the side, it goes great with beef, poultry, seafood and vegetables all the same.

No Need to Feel Guilty: Chocolate Banana Mousse for the soul

Let’s get real here. We all love dessert. If you know someone who says they don’t like desserts, they are either lying or are the living dead. Stab them. Stab them in the dick. Do it now! Save yourself!

The most commonly loved dessert item amongst most people is none other than the wonderful chocolate. 9/10 people swear they could live off of it if they were allowed to by society and nutritionists, sadly we can’t, and more often than not, most of the chocolate in our lives comes from processed candy sources which defile the very concept of chocolate, transforming what was once a pure and antioxidant rich item into a sugar coated joke.

Today, and over the coming weeks I’ll be sharing with you random recipes for utilizing chocolate to satisfy that sweet tooth of yours without messing up your nutrition plan. Heck, some of these will have enough protein to battle it out against your average steak!

Let’s get crackin’! Today’s recipe is none other the coveted Chocolate Banana Mousse!

Yes, mousse is composed of cream, a fuckton of butter and a clusterfuck of sugar, which is why the mousse in this recipe won’t be your traditional type and will require a bit of creativity on your part. There are always alternatives when it comes to cooking and baking and it’s all about reading up and learning how you can use them.

Ingredients:

• 2 bananas
• 8 pitted/skinned ripe black dates
• 1/2 can coconut milk [you can find those in Alfa or Metro or Seoudi supermarkets]
• 1/2 tsp vanilla extract
• 2 Tbsp cocoa powder [Hershey’s unsweetened from Metro/Alfa/Seoudi supermarkets] (can be replaced with 2 scoops of chocolate flavor whey protein)
• 1 Tbsp natural peanut/almond butter
• 1 Tbsp honey (optional)
• A pinch of salt

Directions:

1. Pop open the can of coconut milk, but make sure you grab the thick Thai style coconut milk, not the lighter/thinner version as the higher fat content of real coconut milk is necessary to make a good mousse.
2. Pour half of the coconut milk into a food processor/blender, add the dates, bananas, vanilla extract and peanut butter.
3. After blending for a minute, add the cocoa powder (or whey protein) plus the salt. Pulse a few times then scrape off any chunks which gathered on the sides of the container and continue blending until you have a super smooth consistency.
4. Transfer the mixture into a deep bowl then start whipping the mixture continuously for 5 to 10 minutes to incorporate air into the mousse. If you’re an experienced baker, you’ll already know that mousse mixtures don’t experience a big increase in volume on account of whipping the way heavy cream or egg whites get volumized.
5. Pour your mixture into smaller individual bowls, cover them with saran wrap and refrigerate for an hour or so before consumption. You can always garnish with berries or fresh banana.

This definitely hits the sweet tooth every time. As mentioned you can make it a protein snack/dessert by replacing normal unsweetened cocoa powder with chocolate flavored whey protein scoops.

Give it a try and let me know how it goes for you!

The Little Bean That Could: Foul Medamis (Fava Beans)

It’s a well documented fact that it’s practically part of religious dogma and a downright genetic fate for Egyptian to eat fava beans; more commonly known as “foul medamis”. Despite contradictory reports regarding its benefits or harms (many people cite obscure scientific articles which pinpoint the fava beans’ role in promoting lessened IQ, decreased sperm quality, etc.) I’m here to discuss the bigger picture on this iconic breakfast item consumed by tens of millions in Egypt, the Middle East and indeed across the globe.

First of all, it may come as a surprise to you that different blood types respond differently towards different types of food. For instance, people with type A blood are discouraged from consuming certain meat & poultry items, in addition to avoiding legumes, grains and certain fruits and vegetables whereas those with type B blood are more susceptible to corn and nuts while handling meat and dairy with fair efficiency.

That being said, that doesn’t mean you ought to necessarily weed out entire food items off of your potential menu just because your parents’ genetic combo told you that it’s not all that good for you. All that means is that you should aim for a minimal caloric input from such foods, i.e., don’t let it be your main source, i.e., consume sparingly.

So now that we’ve gone through our mandatory biology class of the day, let’s get down to sprucing that foul sandwich like it’s Mardi Gras. My personal favorite twist on the classic breakfast icon below:

Ingredients:

• Four tablespoons of roasted fava beans (foul medames) sans any additions
• Two to four pieces of whole/multi-grain toast/bread
• One tablespoon olive oil
• Two tablespoons concentrated lemon juice
• One tablespoon of finely diced onions
• ½ teaspoon black pepper
• ½ teaspoon paprika
• ½ teaspoon cumin
• ½ teaspoon salt
• ½ tablespoon mustard
• One whole soft-boiled egg (if desired)

Process:

• Add the fava beans into a fairly deep but small bowl (make sure they are still hot)
• Add the lemon juice and olive oil
• Crush whole beans using a fork and mash the mixture
• Add the onion slices, pepper, salt, paprika, cumin and mustard
• Continue whisking with the fork and mashing any remaining whole beans
• Layer up equally atop your bread
• Slice up your soft-boiled whole egg into four pieces laterally and add one slice per piece of toast (if desired)

Just because it’s healthy doesn’t mean it will look like it does on a menu

Enjoy this modern day twist on a classic breakfast item. Remember, you should generally limit your weekly intake of legumes - as per your blood type - so that it doesn’t contribute more than 30% of your total caloric intake. Add your own twist and share with me by commenting below!

Bonne appétit

Self-Pampering 101: Working them Nuts

More often than not, you'll find that you are unkind to yourself, wishing that life would be kinder to you, that your friends would bestow their kindness upon you and that you deserve to be pampered.

It's probably best if you figure out that there's no one out there who can pamper you better than you. Naturally, in the realm of foods when the word "pamper" comes to mind you jump into cakes, burgers, pizza slices and other waist-expanding treats. That shouldn't be the case. No sir.

You can always take a crack at simple basic ingredients and give them the right twist to add buzzing flavor that'll definitely hit your sweet tooth while actually providing your body with high quality nutrients.

Let's take a crack at a breakfast meal. 

Let's say you're a sucker for peanut butter and jam. Sadly for you fitness freak in the making, jam is basically fruit (which is great) that has been literally drowned in processed sugar (not so great). What to do? How do you get your fix? That sweet, sweet sticky peanut butter. Peanut butter is actually quite amazing if you can get your hands on some high quality natural supplies - since the majority of the off-the-shelf products are super packed with sugars and preservatives. Peanuts are packed full of proteins, healthy fats as well as various antioxidants.

When it comes to peanut butter you've got two routes, one where you buy it from the grocery store (ready made and packaged) 

My recommended options include the Jif natural option (which you can usually find in Seoudi Markets around Cairo) as it's the one with the least ingredients (pretty much just peanuts and sugar and salt) unlike other brands which pack a ton of other processed chemicals and preservatives in there.

Your other option is a recently discovered treasure which I came across by chance, PB2 peanut butter powder which has powdered peanut butter that has 85% less fat [there's even an option with pre-blended-in dark chocolate!]. Where do I get this you ask - since I clearly do not live in a country where they create such awe inspiring wonders for my palette? Why, you can order it by messaging Superfoods Egypt of course! Their Facebook page also showcases plenty of super cool healthy products (including the most wonderful guilt-free probiotic chocolate bars ever!) Another option is ordering naturally made nut butters from Lettuceat, a Zamalek and Nasr City based entity which delivers across Cairo. They have some amazing samples of almond, cashew, peanut and hazelnut butters as well as many salads and sandwiches of the healthy variety. They deliver right to your doorstep, just give 19657 a call!

OR you can make your own! Sounds complicated, really isn't...

Steps for making your own peanut butter [Makes 1 1/2 cup of peanut butter]:

1. Get two cups of pre-roasted (raw) salted peanuts.
2. Spread on a baking pan.
3. Place in an oven (180 degrees Celsius/350 degrees Fahrenheit  for 6 - 8 minutes while shaking the pan every two minutes so they aren't scorched.
4. Let them cool down for a few minutes
5. Add the roasted peanuts to a food processor with a metal blade.
6. Add 1/2 table spoon of peanut oil (if available) or vegetable oil.
7. Work them around the processor for 2-3 minutes till mixture has formed a ball.
8. Scrape the peanuts which get stuck against the walls down using a spoon and keep processing until the desired consistency has been achieved.
9. Add a dash of salt or brown sugar according to taste. Honey can also be blended into the mix during processing.
10. Store in an airtight container (outside the fridge) for a day or two so the taste and flavor settle in and voila! You've made your very own peanut butter!

Alright, now that you've made your very own batch of super healthy peanut butter you sexy chef you, what are you going to do with it? How are you still going to get that sweet taste of fruit on your sticky peanuts without wrecking your waist with jam?

Why, you use frozen fruit of course. The optimal candidate for this is banana, as it takes just under 20 minutes to freeze and can still be easily chopped and mashed (or kept whole) and added directly onto your peanut butter toast. The frozen banana adds a wonderful contrast to the heated multi-grain toast upon which rests the peanut butter - basically a party in your mouth.

You can virtually replicate this using most fruits, berries are also premium candidates, grapes can frozen and sliced to be added atop the toast. You get the idea.

The above example is what I had for breakfast this morning, and you can even spruce it up by adding some flax or Chia seeds or cinnamon sprinkles on top for good measure. You can replace peanuts with almonds or cashews and make different nut butter batters. It's your sandbox to go wild in. Go crazy. Go nuts (pun totally intended)